Dating apps are taboo, no one wants to admit to using them, yet it seems like everyone is on them. In a conversation with a friend of mine about a boy she had dated I had asked her how she had met him and she looked down, quickly mumbling “online.”
Why the shame? Why the embarrassment?
Dating online does not mean you can’t find a date or that you are “dez-ass-perate” as my Haitian mother would say, it simply means you are open to more options and the ability to screen and slide through candidates in seconds.
I, myself, have gone on several dates with guys from dating apps, and although I have yet to come out of one with a relationship, I have come through with a couple of friends and a few lessons learned.
I can share the lessons learned part, not sure if the friends would like to be shared 🙂
1. Try them all out for yourself
I have had friends that have had terrific luck with OKCupid and by terrific I mean living with them and on the verge of getting engaged. When I was on the site myself I found everything that was not even remotely close to my type hitting me up. While for Plenty of Fish, I heard crazy horror stories, but after using it I met really great guys. So basically everyone’s experience on every site is different, do not let that deter you from testing the waters.
2. Use it on vacation
It’s always fun to download Tinder in a new city and swipe just to see who is out there. No one ever sees eligible bachelors or bachelorettes in their own city, but for some reason in a different city other people just seem better looking. Do not limit your app to your home location. I even change the zip codes on my apps at home if I can as well, sometimes you start seeing too many people you know in your home town so its cool to switch it up.
3. Find out each other’s intentions
People use these apps for a wide variety of reasons. Some use it for a fling and others use it to find the person they would like to be with forever, make sure you are on the same page about that before you commit to meet.
4. ALWAYS Facetime or Skype first, a few times actually
You’ve seen Catfish, do I even have to explain?
5. Don’t exchange numbers too quickly
You do not want your inbox filled with a bunch of numbers that may never be touched after the first day. Really feel them out first and make them earn your number.
6. Pick a good cover photo and catchy bio.
This is what lures them in, be honest, be you, save the whack stuff for match.com
7. Do not be embarrassed
It’s fun, it’s 2015, it kills extreme boredom at times. Do not take it too seriously. Like I said I know people who are on the brink of marriage with their online lovers and if that’s not what you are looking for maybe you’ll get a free meal and a good one night stand out of it!